Have you ever dated someone from your …
Have you ever dated someone from your workplace? If so, how did it work out and would you do it again? If you haven’t, would you consider it?
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I HAVE NEVER DATED ANYONE FROM MY WORK PLACE,HOWEVER IF I DID I WOULD MAKE SURE AND KEEP OUR BUSINESS OUT OF THE WORK OFFICE.WHATEVER WE DO OUTSIDE OF WORK IS OUR BUSINESS.
I have done it, and i can tell you it is very hard to leave it out of the work place. Now I don’t know if it was because she was fem, but somehow it was good then it just went down the tubes. And i mean quick fast and in a hurry. I totally would have never known. I will admit i was at fault as well as her for bringing it in to work.
I have a couple of times. I will NEVER do it again. It is very difficult to keep business, business between you and your lover when you see them almost everyday at work. And don’t let it be a rough day with between you and your lover. And try as you may, someone at work always seems to take notice of your “buisness” and there goes the neighborhood.
I haven’t never dated someone at my job and I will never. i know people say never say never but u know what I know people that have done it and you right people will try to get in your business. People will act like they are your friend and then behind your back tell everything. There are alot of people who are lonely and like they say misery loves company. I like my business kept to myself cause what ever is going on in your relationship, people shouldn’t be in it any way. Thats how alot of things start and its more issues than before allowing others in your business. It fine u have that one person who u trust and can talk to but when it becomes a habit of you telling everyone your business that’s not cool. So to answer the question again NO! i will not date anyone at my work place. work is work and pleasure is mmmm… pleasure.
Can’t say that I have nor would I ever consider doing so based on others that I know experience. It never seems to work out and in some cases created HR conflicts with employment status.
My brother had a nightmare with his involvement with a co-worker, which was the lover from hell. The best thing that came out of it was my nephew.
Besides, they expect you to have lunch with them everyday.
B.
I dated a co-worker for a year. We then married for 12 years. After our divorce, (not work related) I tried the “at work” dating thing again, at a different agency. I found out my new mate was mating with over 4 other people in my building. So I did want any irate person would do, I got even. By time I finished with them, they were penniless, jobless, and homeless.
Now that is what I am talking about. Now see what if the person you aren’t dealing with is tryin to do that to you. You gotta tell me your secret.
I have and I did not have a bad experience. After we broke up, we remained friends. We didn’t work in the same department so no one knew we were dating. Would I do it again? Yes. We spend most of our time at work, so there is always the likelihood of meeting someone there. I would just make sure I kept it on the “down low”
what is the deal with fem women though and the workplace. I had the most trouble with them. Is it that you all can’t handle of your stuff in the workplace. What is really the deal.
man, i understand when a person is hurt after they cheated on you and had no respect for u, but to make a person homeless and penniless and all that now that is a person the is bitter. Now dont’ get me wrong when i’m hurt yeah i think of things i want to do to a person but never done it cause i’m a better person that that. you have to always remember what goes aroung comes around and what that person did to u they was gonna get their even if u didnt’ touch them personally. and jay u talk about fems doing things what about u doms now the way u all act as well is not right and for you all not have no respect for one another is wrong! it already hard to find someone to be honest with and sincere to along with trusting but messin with someon at my job that will never happen and yeah they say never say never but in this situation i will cause i just dont’ like people in my business.
Simply stated: KEEP ROMANCE OUT OF THE OFFICE! u’re asking 4 trouble. I haven’t done it but I know people who have and it can be a major nightmare. When things are going bad with the relationship, u end up bringing all of your personal strife n2 the workplace. The workplace already holds enough drama & adding romance n2 the mix can only increase the drama. I also think that couples need time apart and if u are always 2gether, it can become a bit tiresome.
I’ve dated someone at my place of employment one time and it also happened to be my first lesbian relationship. She is gorgeous, has a good head on her shoulders, kind-hearted and, needless to say three years later, we are still going strong! We worked with each other for several years and both have since moved on to other jobs. I would say that it was difficult when we had disputes and I’m quite sure it was noticeable to everyone in the office but all in all, we both matured and learned from each experience and now we no longer “hold grudges.” Life is too short to let all that negative emotion distract you from more important things, damage your feelings for one another and not to mention all the unnecessary emotional drain on your physical. Would I do it again?? Naaaaah, I got lucky with my baby and wouldn’t risk encountering the wrong person - besides she and I are looking to be “life partners” for as long as we are blessed to be.
Ok, so what do you do when the romance has gone sour, and all they want to do is set out to hurt you. What is the deal with if you are hurt, you have to make someone feel your pain. Is that a fem thing. I am not getting it.
To answer your question Jay, that’s not a “fem thing” it’s an “immature thing.” Anyone who is set on making you feel their pain obviously has been deeply hurt in the past and possibly by you in a way she has experienced in the past. She needs healing (but has to want it for herself) and if you are not capable of supporting her through a healing process then you need to let that go and find someone with a more mature mindframe and less baggage.
Well said. I am just baffeled at people who go all out to try and hurt someone intentionally. When the hurt that was caused may not have been intentional. Some women just go over and beyond the call of duty to try an destroy someone else. And the sad part is that sometimes they convince themselves that what they are doing is justified. The justified part I just don’t get.
No, and I dont think I could. That would be just too much for me. If there is something not going well in the relationship and I cant get that much needed space, because I have to deal with this person at work. It would be ugly.
well said HuneeD!! when people r hurting, it is 2nd nature 4 them 2 want 2 seek revenge. counteracting that desire to be vengeful requires a great deal of personal strength and integrity that only comes with maturity. healing can’t begin unless u move away, hopefully forward, from the situation. people in emotional pain can be like “crabs in a barrel”, always trying 2 pull u back down. we’ve all been there & no matter which side of it u’re on, u know that it really doesn’t lead 2 healing—only more pain.
Well said Sha. It is only time that can ever heal pain for both parties not just one side. But I will say, there are some pretty vindictive women out here.
I dont know about all of this. It kind of worries me. I am flirtatious by nature…In my opinion…But as far as actually DATING someone in the workplace…That makes me very nervous. Especially with 2 women since women are such emotional beings! I have to say though that the thought has crossed my mind. Or, maybe not DATING specifically.. I think I would be afraid to cross any lines! I do not think I could make the first move but I dont think I would say NO.
I always date my co-workers. Actually, the relationship that I’m in now is my first time that I’m not in a relationship with a co-worker. It’s worked out fine for me because in the past I worked a lot and most people can’t understand that. However, if you work with your mate then they know first hand what you do and they get it. They know that your making money and bringing it home.
The at work drama? Well, people disagree it’s natural so just as long as you don’t have a violent demeanor and know how to be professional you should be O.K.
Would I do it again? I don’t have to because I’ve found Love!
Dating and sexing are two different things. I’ve had decent, mature workplace affairs, but when I worked with a girlfriend it was pure hell! Her clinginess was overwhelming. For example just because we worked at the same place she expected us to eat lunch together every single day! It got to the point where she was scheduling and confirming water cooler visits, via MS Outlook. Thank goodness it didn’t last, and I no longer need to consider another workplace fiasco. To those that may be considering hooking up at work, Keep it simple. A wise writier once said, “Keep your family and your business completely separated…You moms’ll set that ass up, properly gassed up.”
Yes, and still going strong.
I have “been with” someone that I indirectly worked with. It lasted about two months and then she got crazy. She thought that we were together when in reality it was just “fun.” She ended up getting into a relationship with another female coworker which of course caused major drama. All in all they both quit and I believe they are still together. I probably wouldn’t ever deal with a coworker again. It was too much….. and not worth it.
Well I have 2 rules I follow:
Rule # 1 ” Never get ya Honey where you make ya Money”
Rule # 2 ” Always obey Rule #1
Yeah, I have and it wasn’t THAT bad. However, I wont do it again. She and I met through a mutual friend before I helped her get hired on at the job that I was working at the time. Initially, I didn’t think anything ok here – meaning I had no romantic interest. While working together we grew to be friends and at some point she came out and told me how she felt. I was apprehensive about entertaining this involvement for many reason ONE being that we worked together. But we hooked up and we even MOVED IN TOGETHER so eventually you have us working together and living together. I think there was only one point where we tried to kill each other – lol!!!
I agree with Ronna because I am the type of chick who needs her space, so dealing with someone that I work with is OUT. It is enough that for me you have to see each other everyday when you live together, you sleep together every night so it has to be a break somewhere, DAMN!
Yes, once. Eight years and going strong. But, this came from a part time job, not my primary. At my primary? He// no!! There is a difference between the two but I wouldn’t do it again. People find a way to get into your business. It’s been worth what I’ve endured but like I said I wouldn’t do it again.
Yeah.. I would not call it dating .. though we went on a date.. after she came for me.. lol then we became intimate. I had to cut it off after I hit.. for one I can’t take bi women seriously.. and mainly b/c it wasn’t worth it she was a nice person and clearly it’s not appropriate behavior. The flirting was fun though at first but the sex ruined it.. maybe if she was good in bed..
but she wasn’t bless her heart - - but now we are just colleagues and I like it that way. 
I agree with D 100%
I’ve semi-dated a teacher from school. It all went down like this, I was in school and it was an instructor working there and at first I didn’t know about her life style for 2 or more years. One day she invited me to go somewhere outside the school with her but it seemed completely innocent at first. I decided to go and when we got there it was more so like she was trying to get to know me better. The way I came to this conclusion about this theory was because when she came to pick me up she was looking extremely attractive I’m talking about sexy attire, lip gloss just looking all sexy on her lips, and just her whole posture was different from when we would be in class. When we got to our destination it was like she was trying to show me another side to life that I haven’t been exposed to and she knew that would be something that I would like. Her attitude was mildly sexual towards me because at the same time she was trying to keep it professional. It took a lot in me not to say what I was feeling. I was feeling kind of of uneasy because this is my instructor, someone I would have to see on a daily basis, but, at the same time I liked the idea that the teacher had interest in me. After a while she started to invite me to other places and we became a little closer because we just had the understanding that things can not be overboard in class. But was a time when she was explaining a “sexual harassment situation” and used me for a prop in her example and she started rubbing my shoulders and she said what would you do if your boss or supervisor did this and you didn’t like it what would you do or say. I felt that she almost slipped up and let people get the idea in their head like something was going on. It was other times when she slipped up and did something sexual in the presence of other students but nobody seemed to notice. It was hard to try to make it official because it would’ve jeopardized her job so we kept it on a friendship type level.