Why are bisexual….
Why are bisexual women tagged as being “confused”?
About
welcome 2 our block! the purpose of this site is 2 share our opinion on anything that is going on around the block. Understand that the block isn’t just the street we live on…it’s the entire community around us and these days with the internet and media, that could mean anywhere around the globe…better yet , let’s just open it up completely and say the block is the entire galaxy. The block also means whatever is spinning around in our heads…we have some pretty big “block” heads, so there’s no telling what might be going on inside them.
-
« Feb 
May » March 2008 M T W T F S S 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 EC April 2008 M T W T F S S 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 EC - Events
- No events.
Main Menu
Archives
Categories
- Dating (9)
- Events (25)
- Messing Up (5)
- Political (2)
- What… (14)
- Would you… (4)
- Your Block (61)
Misc
I’ll put it in the words of a lady that I was in a group conversation with at one of the Barcode events, “Sometimes when I have a banana I really just want some apples and sometime when I have an apple, I just really want a banana.” They seem as though they can never be truly satisfied with one sex or the other. I’m not saying that they are overly promiscuous, however they do seem harder to please, not only sexually but emotionally. You couldn’t pay me to knowingly get involved with one, I don’t care how fine she is.
I personally do not agree with the lady mentioned in the above statement about wanting one when you have the other. I can be perfectly happy with women alone. For some bisexuals, we simply acknowledge that there may be a possibility that we could have a healthy, satisfying relationship with a man. Not that we can’t make our minds, or will ever choose be with a man. Although there are few bisexuals that will choose to be exclusively with a woman long-term, we are out there. A more self-aware bisexual will tell you exactly how they feel, and what they want or can do. Do give up on all of us! Some of us feel the same way as Sexual Chocolate and will only date lesbians too. But even then, you have to sometimes wonder about women who say they’re lesbian, but have a man from time to time. You have find the person that’s right for you regardless of what label they fall under.
I see where you are coming from Self-Aware, but you are in a minority. Unfortunately there are a lot of bi-sexuals that aren’t as at peace with the duality of their sexual attractions. Personally, I would not ‘knowingly’ take the risk of dealing with a woman who has sex with men, whether they identify as lesbian, bisexual or otherwise. But I wish all those that chose to do so the very best of luck.
Funny you should ask this question. . .
Bi-Sexuals are labeled as confused because they allow their straight side to label them.
Bi-Sexuals are liars who suppress themselves. Yes, all of them! Women who don’t deal with their shit flip flop through life fucking whoever.
They lie to themselves and they lie to their partners in the name of lust because they are weak and they lack substance.
As a result, straights lump lesbians and bi-sexuals into the same category, and our relationships are not respected because we’re all viewed as fuckable.
(Yes, I am in my feelings)LOL!
I THINK BEING BISEXUAL COULD BE VIEWED AS BEING CONFUSED BUT BEING BI DOES NOT MEAN YOU ARE BEING INTIMATE WITH MEN IT JUST SOMETIMES MEAN YOU DO HAVE AN ATRRACTION TO MEN BUT HAVE A STRONGER PERFERENCE TO WOMEN WHO YOU CHOOSE TO SLEEP WITH DETERMINES SOMETIMES YOUR SEXUALITY IM ATRRACTED TO MEN BUT I LOVE WOMEN I DONT SLEEP WITH MEN ONLY WOMEN BUT IT DOESNT CHANGE MY ATRRACTION TO MEN ANYONE THAT FEELS UNCOMFORTABLE BY THAT MAY NOT BE WITH ME BUT WITH THERE OWN SEXUALITY
First of all why the label, we are who we are and we do what we do.
whether it be a man or woman, I personally think if you are into women then stick with a woman be committed and if you are with a man then be with a man. It’s not good being with both at the same time, with all the std’s & dieases that’s out. I don’t think that’s it’s confusing I just think people want the best of both worlds and they need to be really careful for what they ask for.
I think that many call bi women confused bc it is very scary to date a bi woman. You have to have a good amount of self-esteem to realize that though she is attracted to both sexes, if she is with YOU, she is WITH YOU. The fact that she thinks both men and women are attractive has nothing to do with her relationship with you. Many people doubt bisexuals’ fidelity but I would not doubt a bisexual any more than I would doubt a lesbian. It is all about being secure in your relationship and trusting your partner. Lesbians, straights and bisexuals are all human so trust and trust alike AND respect and respect alike.
I don’t think bi chicks are confused at all, I think they know exactly who they are and what they want, the reasons why they choose duality may be different but they know why. I dated one ONCE, I will NEVER do that again because she did what everyone told me she would do… slept around with guys. Even now, she still sleeps guys.
No too long ago tells me that she wants a girlfriend, and get this.. she wants a STUD! She can’t figure out why she can’t find one, LOL!
I just shake my head at the whole nasty thing.
I get where many of you are coming from. As a bisexual myself, I wouldn’t trust being with another bisexual unless I was friends with them long enough to know who they really are. I can’t, and don’t want to, deal with the flip-floppers. It’s fine if you’re single, but if your committed, be committed or find someone that’s okay with you being polyamorous.
my! my! my! I have dated ONE Bixesual woman…and GOD as my witness never again…I went to jail behind her azz! Yes, these women are indeed confuse…Why! now, don’t get me wrong the ones who know deep down they are attracted to both men and women and admit it FINE…but, stay away from me…but, the ones who say “I love you” are you serious then go right behind you and f-ing out of both holes…the situation to me is just nasty…I know of one as we speak who is sleeping with a man then gets jealous when the woman she wants is meeting new people…GEt a grip…
I wouldn’t tag bisexual women as being confused? I think they are very aware of their sexuality and enjoy sex form either gender. Those who think they are confused probably enjoy sex from one gender exclusively. So, they don’t understand flip flopping because they don’t choose to do that. If a person doesn’t want to limit themself to one gender as far as choosing a life partner or a potential suitor for a relationship then to each his own. Its a personal choice, why limit yourself? The problem would lay with not saying you are bisexual.
(devils advocate)
From a sexual perspective, what about lesbians who like to be pleased by a strap on. Do you think they like it and may not want the real thing? Or at one point in time haven’t had the real thing, mmmmmmmm??? Are they confused because they enjoy that body part as women, we don’t possess.
(on another note)
In my opinion, a major problem when engaging in a realationship is infidelity especially in the Gay community. I think when a person deals with someone who is bisexual they see the increased odds to be cheated on. In lying the main concern of most when dating a person who is admittedly bisexual. Lets face it, infidelity knows no gender. Trouble summed it up best. I echo her comments from 3/9/08.
What ever happened to monogamous relationships? Sleeping around is nasty, lesbian, straight, bisexual or otherwise.
Interesting comments from all parties. I see this subject hits a sore spot. Bisexual women are not confused. They like men and they like women. Period. Sexuality is fluid. I know women that identify as straight up, hardcore lesbians, ( the boyish types) and like dick about once a year and have begged me to never breath a word to anyone about it. There are bisexual women who have relationships with women and only women…when with women. When they want a man..then its just with men. Bisexual women who want to be with a woman every now and then and bisexual women who want a man every now and then. Get my drift. Sexuality is like politics and religion. There are just too many variations out there to be all worked up about how a person identifies their sexuality. BUT…I believe the confusion comes in because some bisexual women are not honest about what they want when entering a relationship. They are ridiculed and ostricized. They feel bad and then can’t get what they want. So they lie so they can get some of what they want. Sound familiar?
I think the confused ones should just call themselves Questing… and stop using “bisexual” to identify them self… Bisexual already means something…Just as lesbian, Queer, Transgender, Intro-sexual, Gay means something…
I know a lot of bisexual women… and they are looking for a sound strong healthy exclusive relationship just like you and I… the difference is… they can have that relationship with either gender…and that doesn’t mean at the same time either… I know a friend of mine talks about man that could eat well… or a woman that can strap well…
I kind of think that’s cool… “love with either gender”… just the “Personality”… and get all in one…
I’m a lesbian so I don’t have that luxury… but its still cool 2 me.
It seems that the angry replies to this question come from a place of personal experience, i.e., you got burned by an immature woman that YOU chose. As a bisexual woman, I can’t help but feel marginalized by the idea that all bisexual women are confused and prone to infidelty. To echo the sentiments of another poster, it’s about security within a relationship, be that homo, hetero, or otherwise. And I live by the credo that if I’m with you, then I’m with you. Do NOT generalize the bisexual experience through the filter of your own negative experiences.
I put another question to the forum: what does it mean when lesbians state that they don’t want to “come behind dick” when referencing dating bisexual women? Not for nothing, the lesbians that I know went through a journey of self-discovery that included dating and often, having sexual relationships with, men. Are they confused too?
I’m bisexual and enjoy both worlds. I love the way women make me feel and their intellect. In addition, I find woman intriguing to the point where I find myself drawn to them. My girlfriend on the other hand doesn’t understand why I’m attracted to men if I’m so drawn to women. My only explanation is that my attraction to men is truly physical in nature. I enjoy penatration. Is it something wrong with that?
Stop playing. . .Choose. . .
Deal with your shit. At this point in life, it’s not about limitations. . .it’s about reality. Who are you and what do you want?
From what I’ve read it all boils down to SEX or so called attraction. Therefore, bi-sexual women are: indecisive women who choose seek empowerment by sleeping with men and women.
Ew…that’s some bamma shit…Choose!
I think bi-sexual woman, who are confident and know what they want, don’t get caught up into the sex of a person as much as they do happiness with someone. I can love a woman or a man. What I’m mostly interested in is a healthy relationship. It just so happens that the love of my life is a woman and our relationship is precious. However, if we were not together I wouldn’t pursue another woman or a man, I’ll pursue happiness.
Personally I think bi-sexual women are sexually adventurous. They are not afraid of their sexuality and as a dom lesbian I can appreciate their uninhibited performance behind closed doors. As for “love” well you shouldn’t have that expectation in your relationships with these women. Not that they aren’t worthy of falling in love with, but you limit who they are and how they negotiate their sexual space. When a Bi- woman enters my life I know it is only temporary and I make the most of our short sexual interlude. Bi-sexual women ROCK!
perhaps bisexuals are labeled confused by those who never see
shades gray, just black and white. it sounds like it comes from someone who believes that each gender is diverse enough to offer a whole spectrum of possibilities. personally i see bisexuality (or omnisexuality) as being the most all-encompassing love and it is deeply tied to spirituality.
I am an Abstinent Christian Bi Sexual Woman and I want to engage on a level of companionship at this time. I prefer not enagage in sexual relationships at this time because I want to be secure in knowing a particular person is healthy for my mind and spirit first whether that be a man or woman. I would really prefer a relationship with a woman and admittedly will have engage sexually from time to time with one. However not for years with a man since 05 and that was just getting eatten out. I feel unless I am getting married or on the way to married with a man, the risk behind men is too much, babies and Aids and stuff. I also think Bisexual men should be more liberated with their women if they have their women’s best interest at heart.
Hello…
If anyone ever studied the Kinsey scale, the scale went from 0: meaning totally heterosexual to 6: totally homosexual. Kinsey found that people fell between 1 and 5, bisexuality being in the middle. from the I and I alone..It’s about choices, chosing who to love. Bisexuals can have long-term relationships with either partner(s) it is all about honesty, having a open communication with whoever you involve yourself with.. just my 2-cents
E.
‘AngryBlackLady’ said it perfectly sweet for me. I do understand the bisexual dating fear. Many have been burned by bisexual individuals and prefer not to relive the experience but learn from it. I do think the generalization that ALL bisexuals are confused, easy, slutty, sexually adventurous, unfaithful, etc; does not apply to ALL. And that these characteristics can be applied to all sexual orientations. Attractions come in different forms and sexual attractions will change and evolve as you grow and mature in life. One would never know what is present for you if you do not open the gift, no matter what label, shape, colour, form, it comes in. I just encourage all people to choose wisely who enters into your precious life and learn from all experiences. Love freely and be blessed. I am a poly-pansexual, cause my personal belief is to have multiple loves of varying degrees (not always and often not sexual in nature). Allow your relationships to grow organically and values, mind, and body, will do the same.
Peace and Love People,
SyrCal
When I first came out I identified as bisexual because my attraction to men took a while to fade. I was shocked at the view lesbians had towards bisexuals, particularly because so many lesbians also had horror stories about being cheated on/betrayed by other lesbians. I don’t date more than one person at a time, nor do I sleep around. It was ironic to hear the same women who’d dated 12 women in 12 months & slept with all of them talk about my morals, when I hadn’t slept with anyone for years!
For those of you who’ve been hurt by bisexual women, I’m sorry. There are some cheating bisexual women out there just as there are cheating lesbians, men, etc. Use your best discretion so that you’re not deceived again. By anyone.
Putting someone down for who they’re attracted to is like heterosexuals who condemn us for being lesbian/gay. The Creator made us all the way we are for a reason
NOw I agree with you above , b/c Some statements Steam from the Fact that MAybe the Person that Is Judging Had a Bad Experiences… there are So many types Of People that you will Never be able to Put In a Box Ever… An i believe that I am One Of them ….Some Lesbians how ever do Have Horror Stories( an I respect them for being Strong Women through it all But, you must GROW with the person before judging them as you said above ( Like Simply Man HATEing) AN there are Some Lesbians that respect the Relationship that there in and take the time to develop a relationship… with NO Judgments Attached… Im with you SPIRIT!!!!
Ase-O!!!!
Live; Love; an Be FREE to Be!!!
Peronally, I don’t think the average bisexual is confused. I think alot of people, who are actually gay, str8, curious, freaky, etc. hide behind the banner of “bisexual” during their journey to self-discovery. People get involved with THESE confused people, end up hurt, and label all bisexuals as sexual deviants who shouldn’t be trusted. It’s sad and wrong.
There’s nothing wrong with bisexual women, imo. They can be as fucked up and as great as lesbians. If you don’t understand monogamy, honesty, communication, maturity, and trust, then bi or gay, you’re not the woman for me. I’ve met bisexuals who clearly said…look, I’m bi and I don’t plan on being monogamous. I’ve met lesbians who said the same thing. What’s the difference? There is none. If you choose to enter into a relationship without finding out who the person is & what they want out of the relationship, well then, that’s your fault. Sorry…
I think that bi sexual women are being tagged as being confused because they are interested in the same sex and the opposite sex. Some people don’t understand how that is posible. I bi-sexualility is for those people that always want attention and affection from somebody so it doesn’t matter what sex it is as long as their desires are being met. It is also a concern because when you are in a relationship and the one of the partners are bi-sexual you would not only have to worry about cheating from one sex but both sexes so it is incredibly risky to take on a bi-sexual partner. I think bi-sexuals are hard to please and therefore stay away or beware because your feelings are bound of getting hurt sooner or later.